I showed him my bush... on skype.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
