plz talk dirty to me
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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