she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
