so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
