talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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