i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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