Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
