Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize