thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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