The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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