no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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