Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize