That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
