let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize