There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
