I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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