How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Randomize
