FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize
