so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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