Can Purell be used as lube?
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
