sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
