I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
