That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
