Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
