So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
we made out on top of his cat.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
