If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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