Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Randomize
