Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
