why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
