Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
