Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
