I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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