He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize