omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
They left me at home... I'm a liability
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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