I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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