ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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