Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
She even gives head with a lisp.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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