yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
