I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
