Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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