Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
