Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
