You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
