I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
