It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Maybe he injected his testicle?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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