I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
