So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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