there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Sorry about my life...
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Randomize
