It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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