you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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