all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
