Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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